Relocating Overseas With Your Spouse
For some people it has always been their dream to move to a different country, for others the relocation comes from a job transfer. No matter what the reason is for your move, your spouse may not share your enthusiasm. It is a difficult balance in letting your spouse live their dream, while not sacrificing too much of the things that you want out of life. Unfortunately because of this, a lot of times a marriage cannot survive an international move. But it does not happen this way every time. Many married couples make it work by keeping certain things in mind while dealing with an international relocation.
The number one thing that most married couples will tell you is the key to any successful relationship is communication. This is especially true when you are moving to a new country. There are a lot things that have to be done in order to move somewhere new, and you both need to be on board with every step along the way. Whether it is what moving company to use, what kind of house you want to buy, and what kind of neighborhood you want to live, you have to both decide that it is what you want or it will never work out. The same is true for any problems that you may have. Do not be afraid to speak up if you are uncomfortable with any step of the process. They are your spouse after all love you completely, so it should not be a problem communicating your desires and concerns.
To go along with this idea, you will also probably have to make some sacrifices as well. Unless it was a completely mutual decision, chances are one party is making a huge sacrifice to start with. Remember that as you plan how you want your move to take place, and where you want to live. Compromise is a very important facet of any marriage, which means that there has to be a lot of give and take. Do not allow one person to be doing all of the giving, because at some point they will run out of things to give and just walk away. Once you get there, remember that you both are going through culture shock, and need each other to help assimilate to your new country. Make sure you are talking to each other and doing your best to give each other what you need. It is a partnership after all, and going through something with another person is far better than doing it alone.
Attitude and Expectation
One of the best things you can do is to maintain a positive attitude. If you keep an open mind, and allow yourself to focus on the positive aspects of your move, it will probably rub off on your spouse as well. The power of positivity is a very real thing, and it can help your overall quality of life. But while you are trying to be positive, you should also be sympathetic if your spouse is still having a hard time. Make sure that you are in tune with what each other is feeling and do the best you can to lift each other up when it is necessary.
By managing your expectations, and fully understanding what each other wants out of the new place that you are moving, you should find it easier to cope with all of the changes that will take place. You need to fully communicate what you are expecting out of each other while you are there. How much time will be devoted to work or school? How much time will you be able to spend together? All of these questions need to be answered and accepted before your move takes place if your marriage is going to survive. But make no mistake, moving to a brand new land can be an enriching experience that you can share together. So make sure that you both are making the most of it.
